Ages ago I took a vow ‘to be of service’ in accord with the teachings of Shantideva, an 8th century monk-philosopher from India. His Way of the Bodhisattva [1] consists of 134 verses grounded generosity, perseverance, meditative stability, and wisdom. For example:
For all those ailing in the world,
Until their every sickness has been healed,
May I myself become for them
The doctor, nurse, the medicine itself.
Like the earth and the pervading elements,
Enduring as the sky itself endures,
For boundless multitudes of living beings,
May I be their ground and sustenance. [2]
To Shantideva, “a bodhisattva thinks of everything as belonging to someone else, and does not own anything.“[3]
What belongs to you, does not belong to me: that I understand. But what about pain, grief, and unhappiness? Doesn’t ‘to serve’ mean to try and minimize those? Isn’t that why I volunteer in geriatric care, attend at the bedside, and officiate at memorial services?
Yes, but No.
Things get sticky when intentions become entangled with expectations. As in: if I put others’ well-being ahead of my own, will they benefit from such action? What if they decline my service, will I have failed? O dear — simply welcome the opportunity to serve and let go of seeking accolades. Shantideva writes, „But difficult it is to be a monk indeed. / And hard it is for minds enmeshed in thoughts / To pass beyond the bonds of [their own] suffering” [2].
And my counsellor —
“You can try on the other‘s suffering to see how it fits, that is good. But you‘ll do them a disservice if you walk away with their pain. You are robbing them of the opportunity to grow. Try it on, feel it deeply, and give it back with love. Surrender to ‚what is’ with gentle, loving acceptance that there is nothing to be done.”
[1] Bodhisattva is the Sanskrit term for someone who commits to put the happiness of others ahead of their own. [2] Padmakara Translation Group. (1976). Shantideva: The way of the bodhisattva. Shambala, pp. 51, 134. [3] Goodman, Charles. (2016). The Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, online.
Thanks, Peter. It was a long hot night for me too.
Dear Peter
A deep bow – thank you!
Good intentions wrapped in ego – cringe.
Clarity and release.
I am handing back lovingly and gently.
So appreciating your guidance 🙏🙏
Dear Peter,
You have no inkling of how many hundreds and thousands of beings have benefitted from your vow. You have been of service to innumerable people and given them the strength to be of service to others and so it goes in ever widening circles. As humans, we have no idea how the smallest act of kindness, a smile, a word, can go forth into the world and make a positive impact.